New Year’s Resolutions for a Stronger Marriage

Six Actionable Steps for First Responders to Improve Marriages and Relationships

Did you know January is the leading month for divorce?

While every situation is unique, common reasons can include individuals looking for a fresh start for the new year with a prioritization on self-care, added stress around the holidays, financial hardship and/or a desire to wait until after the numerous family gatherings are over during the holiday season. For first responders who often have added schedule conflicts, stress and job demands or trauma, the impact on a relationship during this time of year can be amplified.

This January, we encourage you to dig into your relationships and community, prioritize quality time and take steps to bring God and biblical principles to your relationships. You won’t regret it.

Ecclesiastes 4:12 says “A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

We are passionate about supporting our first responder families and strengthening marriages and relationships through our ministry. All of our resources and your generous donations to The Shelter Foundation are stewarded to provide resources, events, counseling and marriage retreats for first responders.

With each new year comes the opportunity for fresh starts, personal goals and a look at what could be. Here are some new year’s resolutions for prioritize your marriage.

1. Prioritize Quality Time

Make a resolution to prioritize quality time as a family or a couple. Consider establishing dedicated moments, like a weekly family game night or a monthly outing, to strengthen the bonds that hold your family together. While first responder schedule demands may exist, look to take advantage of off days to pursue activities, day dates or getaways to connect. The best way to have “quality” time is to have “quantity” time. You’ll find your connection and your communication will improve as a result. Need help with an idea? We’ve put together 10 Date Ideas for First Responders.

2. Cultivate a Support System

Helen Keller said, “Alone, we can do so little; together, we can do so much.” Develop a strong support system within the first responder community and among other families. Share experiences, offer advice, and lean on each other during both challenging and celebratory times, creating a network that understands the unique dynamics of your lifestyle. Look to join a Bible Study, a small group or pursue friendships with regular get togethers to foster a sense of community.

Financial plan for First Responders and marriage — Having regular financial discussions can reduce stress and arguments.

3. Financial Planning

Create a financial plan that considers the unpredictability of a first responder's job. Establish an emergency fund and set financial goals to reduce stress and provide a sense of security for the family's future. Consider working with a financial advisor who can customize a plan based on your situation and goals. Money arguments are the second-leading case of divorce, only behind infidelity and nearly half of couples who are $50,000 in debt say money is their top reason for arguing. (Source) No matter your income level, having a financial plan in place can provide added peace to your mental health and your relationship.

4. Foster Faith and Spirituality

Make a resolution to strengthen your family's faith or bring you as a couple closer in your walk with God. Attend services together, pray together, and find comfort and support in your shared beliefs. Remember, the power of prayer lies not in the one saying the prayer, but in the One who hears our prayers.

5. Celebrate Milestones

Recognize and celebrate achievements, no matter how small. Whether it's a work accomplishment, a personal goal, or a family milestone, take the time to acknowledge and appreciate each other for the positive moments that make up your shared journey. Life is stressful enough. Celebrate your wins and important milestones.

6. Plan Regular Getaways

Schedule regular family getaways or vacations to unwind and create lasting memories. These breaks from routine provide an opportunity to relax, connect, and rejuvenate as a family, reinforcing the importance of shared experiences in building a strong and resilient family unit. These don’t have to break the bank or the family schedule either. Whether it’s as small as a daily walk together, weekly breakfast date, weekend getaway or a grand vacation, it’s less about where you go and more about who you’re going there with.

There is always hope and we know the source of our hope.

And you are never alone.

Consider this story of hope from a first responder couple we had the opportunity to help:

“My firefighter husband and I were having serious marital problems and an emotional affair even occurred. He moved out for a while and we were lost on what to do. Today, we are completely in love again (it feels like when we first met again even!) and are living together again and raising our family. The Shelter Foundation also had a hand in getting us into church. The Shelter Foundation ultimately saved our family.”

As followers of Jesus, we want to focus our energy and lives on the things that will last forever. We encourage you to browse our other articles below for more practice advice for your first responder marriage.

The Shelter Foundation is committed to honoring first responders and supporting their families all year long. We are grateful for your support, helping to provide tangible hope for first responder families, wives and widows.

There are multiple ways you can join us in support:

Pray for our first responder families. You can sign up for our email list here for monthly updates.
Spread the word. Follow us on social media and engage with and share our posts and content to your friends.
Make a one-time or recurring tax-deductible gift here.
Shop our TSF store where all proceeds go towards First Responder families.

More from The Shelter Foundation:

New Year’s Resolutions for a Stronger Marriage

Six Actionable Steps for First Responders to Improve Marriages and Relationships

Embracing Flexibility with Your Spouse Through Grace, Humor & Understanding

Bring the Magic of Christmas to Your First Responder Schedule